Little brother growing up

It feels like just yesterday. We sent him off to shul with a bag of sour sticks, evidence of it drooling down his chin. His hair was freshly washed and combed, that action taking some time and effort, and a bit of struggling. He looked so cute and little in his tiny sneakers. And today was the day. He was getting his first haircut.

That was ten years ago. This week my little brother will be turning thirteen. He is my youngest sibling, and the last of the boys to have a bar mitzva. It should feel more special and momentous, but somehow it's not. It just feels normal. Regular.

A few years ago when my sister was not yet married I said, iy''h by the time my little brother's bar mitzvah comes around, she will be married, and maybe we will even have a niece or nephew to celebrate with. B"H my 'prophecy' came true. My sister is married, and my little niece will be at the bar mitzvah.

I am happy for him. I know to a little boy a bar mitzvah doesn't mean much. Your friends come, you get money and presents, you have cake, and dancing. And for Orthodox Jews, the boy is not exactly taking on the mitzvot for the first time. They are trained from when they are young, so that when they come to the point where they are obligated to do them, they won't be so hard and burdensome. So what does a bar mitvah mean, exactly? I guess it means he is growing up.

To my mother he will always be her 'baby'. And she does baby him. I can imagine he will be married and my mother will still call up reminding him little things, making him food, driving him places. But such is the way of a mother. To me he will always be the little brother who is slightly annoying, sometimes okay, and will never grow up.

To my little brother: (name excluded, in case it will G-d forbid affect his future shidduchim***) I wish you much happiness, and hope that your growing up years will be smooth and not bumpy, and that one day I will look at you and no longer see you as a baby, but a mature adult, and an equal.

Now lets hope that I can find a dress in time for the bar mitzvah, and that it will truly be a joyous occasion.

Mazal tov!

*** meant strictly as a joke.