If a tree falls in a forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a noise?
Is a success truly a success if no one was around to see it? When a child learns how to walk, or do a new task for the first time, they run to show their parents. 'Look at me! Look what I can do!' right before they fall.
It's so important to a human to receive validation for their actions, or state of being. Yes, your smart. Yes, your pretty. If your confidence is shot to hell, it is good to hear these things. Some people like to hear them regardless, because they have a big ego.
I gave a speech today, for class. But I came early, and said it for the 1st class that the teacher gives, not my usual class with the familiar girls. Because my teacher thought we would be short on time. So no one in my class got to hear my speech, besides for the teacher.
I felt cheated, in a way. I wanted them to applaud me, tell me what a good job I did. The girls in the other class did that, but I don't even know them, so it didn't mean much.
We were finished all the speeches, and had 10 minutes to spare, so I asked the teacher if I could say mine again, so my classmates could hear it. Of course the answer was no.
My speech was great. Perhaps I'll put it up as a post. But it would have been nice to hear other people say good things about it.
So what is it about humans that makes them need compliments? Really, why?
First of all your speech was awesome, everybody loved it. We humans (or worse jews) need to know that what we do matters to somebody, and since we are not patient enough to wait to see how our actions influences everybody as a whole we want constant, immediate confirmation that our actions changed somebody's day, for the good or not good. The Moshel would be a post without comments, it hurts.
ReplyDeleteGo to sleep
hey, I went for three weeks without comments! It didn't hurt so bad
ReplyDeleteRight, it hurt so little that after 10000000 voted a day you turned it back on (mazel tov on that btw)
ReplyDeleteI think that the reason that you wanted the second class to hear it is because you know them, presumably respect them, and that makes their opinion of you're self-worth that much more valuable...
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of comments though, for some reason I can't comment on any blog with embedded comments enabled. Something to do with my phone's browser. Anybody else having those issues?
Big n8t, for a second there I thought you actually read it. But thanks. I'm gonna post it, just try not to bash it too much.
ReplyDeleteAnd yossi, I wouldnt have been able to do that. Because to me, a silent blog is hard. Even though I still kept going during the 1st year of writing, when no one actually read my stuff. But glad to have the comments back.
Lazeboy, you are right, thanks.
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ReplyDelete"If a tree falls in a forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a noise?"
ReplyDeleteI think that question is a scientific one: Things don't make noise; movement creates sound waves that our ears translate into noise. The question is: If there are no ears to hear the noise, does the movement create noise?
But your dilemma is a valid one nonetheless. I know I constantly need validation and reassurance-it is more necessary for women than men, but all people need to be appreciated. But it's important that we have this interdependence; without it the human species would become extinct...
oh no, and we dont want them to become extint, do we?
ReplyDeleteyou are right of course, but i dont like that need for dependence.