A bissel Dvar Torah

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And now for the dvar torah...
(From Rabbi Akiva Wagner)

The following true story is related about more than one chosid, with minor variations, this is what I remember (additional details welcome:)

The three Chassidim were traveling together, pursuing an urgent matter of askonus haklal. One of them was the celebrated chossid R’ Itche der masmid, who was renown for his refinement.

During there travels, they had to meet in a hotel. In this hotel, one wall of the lobby was adorned with a large and beautiful floor to ceiling mirror. In the middle of their meeting, R’ Itche suddenly jumped up, and ran towards the mirror. Then, as he was about to reach it, he – just as abruptly – turned around, and returned abashedly to his place.

When his colleagues asked him for an explanation, R’ Itche, who had never had reason or inclination to observe his own reflection, and thus had no way of knowing what he looked like, clarified as follows: “Ich hob gezehn a Yid mit a hadras ponim, bin ich gleich tzugegangen geben em sholom: [I saw a dignified-looking Jew, so I immediately went to greet him].

The fact of the matter is, in most cases, the biggest obstacle to our own self-betterment is our self-doubt. Many of us will say or think:

‘Of course it would be wonderful to be a chassidisher Yid; I admire them and I respect them, but it’s not gonna happen anyways. I’m just not cut out for it. I’m a lost case, I’ll never know how to learn, I’ll never be able to daven. It’s too late for me.
I can’t be a chassidisher Yid any more. I’m too much of a shin-vov-vov. I made as well at least enjoy olam hazeh (and not remain a “kireach mikan umikan)’
If we truly believed that we have the ability to achieve the same levels of davening and chassidishkeit as those who we look up to, then most of us would have no question about it being worth any amount of effort or sacrifice. But it seems unrealistic and out of reach.

[Once, during a meeting with parents, I had to defend the policy of the Yeshiva of limiting the opportunities the bochurim have to go home for Shabbos. I related the story with R’ Akiva, how after 12 years he didn’t even go into his house to greet his family, but returned for an additional 12 years. I observed, as the meforshim point out, that he not spent 24 uninterrupted years in Yeshiva, it would not have been the same experience, and the achievement would have been lost.

At this point, one mother stage-whispered to the mother sitting next to her: ‘If at least I could expect to see a R’ Akiva at the end, then the hardships would be easier to bear . . .’
It was a very revealing moment for me, and a very painful one. This mother had written off her child before even giving him a chance. She had already decided that he wouldn’t amount to anything special (whether it’s a R’ Akiva or R’ Itche der masmid or etc.),
and while she has to put him through the “system” of Yeshiva, there was no expected benefit from it that would justify giving up the opportunity to personally serve him cholent every Shabbos.

Unfortunately, this is the outlook of many bochurim as well. They perceive Yeshiva as the unavoidable part of the “system” that bridges that gap between cheder and when they can go on shlichus and actually do something constructive with their lives. If the bochur felt that through learning in Yeshiva he can become a genuine Tomim, just like all of the T’mimim that h read about or heard about, then he would view the time spent in Yeshiva as the most important investment he could ever make].

The Rebbe, year after year, emphasized and elaborated on the vort and moshol of the Bertichever that on Shabbos Chazon we are shown the 3rd Beis Hamikdosh. The Beis Hamikdosh (as mentioned earlier) is not merely a geographical location or a physical structure.The Beis Hamikdosh is the experience of perceiving G-dliness, The state of every individual’s Beis Hamikdosh being built is living a life of G-dliness, of holiness, of spirituality, of a genuine chossid.It’s the way every individual is meant to live.

But when we gaze at our reflection in the mirror, chances are that we see a churban. We see destruction and chaos, with no trace of the beauty and splendor and holiness that the Beis Hamikdosh represents to us.We see ourselves as being as distant as can be from a rebuilt beis HaMikdosh (as did R’ Itche der masmid as well, who complained the Rebbe Rashab about the fact that he has a guf megusham).
It appears out of reach, an unrealistic goal.But on Shabbos Chazon, the Eibishter shows us the 3rd Beis Hamikdash in all of its’ glory.This is surely true in a personal level as well. On Shabbos Chazon we look into the mirror, and we see a fdignified chossid gazing back at us. And we’re told: “this is you, the way you really are”.

It’s not ch”v out of reach. It’s there already, you can see it, you can almost touch it. And this vision convinces that it is practical and realistic, that it is worth putting in any necessary effort to rebuild and reveal our personal Beis haMikdosh. We can and we will change our lives, and increase our awareness of and connection to the Eibishter.
Any one of us strives for this and yearns for this. When we perceive that it’s within our reach, that is the best motivation to get back on track and redouble our efforts to realize it.
If Torah tells that on Shabbos Chazon we’re shown the Bais haMikdosh, then we can be certain that this is true. It is a time when we have the ability to see ourselves for who we really are.

But even when being shown something, it is up to us to decide whether to look at what we’re being shown, or ch”v look away. We have to take advantage of this opportunity of Shabbos Chazon to actually see and focus on the BHMK in its’ rebuilt state, both in the collective sense and in the personal sense.
And this will be sufficient motivation for us to do the last bit of work, to be able to actually see the BHMK in its’ physical and tangible state – MAMOSH!L’chaim! May we all take advantage of the vision of Shabbos Chazon to better our conduct, and may Hashem in turn provide with the true and ultimate showing of the 3rd BHMK, with the hisgalus of Moshiach Tzidkeinu TUMYM!!!

Hatzlocho Rabo!! Rabbi Akiva Wagner