A tiny sliver of truth

I wondered when the words would dry up,
the page would go blank,
and my mind would stop thinking,
my heart would stop dreaming.

I wondered when I'd freeze up in fear,
paralyzed, unable to move.
Unaware, of the world out there,
shrunken to my tiny reality.

I hold his little body close to me,
as he drifts off to sleep.
I gasp, and he jumps,
startled awake.

I rock him gently and pat his back,
and tell him that everything will be okay,
that we are going to be just fine.
I know he believes me.

I believe it too.
I know I will be okay.
I know, because here I am,
years later, strong as ever, and still going.

I know, because every time life kicked me down,
I got right back up,
and laughed in its cruel face,
And steeled myself even more.

But sometimes,
I don't want to be just okay anymore.
Sometimes,
I don't want to be just fine.

Sometimes,
I want to scream to the world,
how I'm feeling,
Spray it on the wall for all to see.

Sometimes,
I want to get mad at how things turned out,
except I'm not really sure
where to address my anger.

I will be okay.
I will be just fine.
Sometimes,
that's a bitter pill to swallow.