Who ever thinks about high school once it's over? Throw up your hat at graduation, move on and never look back. Alumni? Reunions? Who cares. Life gets in the way. School. Marriage. Kids. Important things. Most people stay in touch with only a handful of people from high school. People make friends with their 'best friends for life' from seminary, college, etc. High school is rarely thought about, if ever.
I happen to have had a decent relationship with my high school principals, and I am still close to a few girls from high school. I met my 'inner circle' friends in seminary. But I still chat with girls from high school now and again. When someone came up with an idea for an Alumni newsletter, I said sure why not. I even volunteered to be class head, which means it is my job to get the mazal tov's and news and any submissions from my former classmates.
The problem is, my class is not interested. I get it. Our high school was small. How many times a month are girls having babies and getting married? Yes it is a beautiful idea to keep in touch, however I understand why girls would not be interested in reading it or hearing about it.
So why do I feel like a loser for trying? When girls email to say 'please stop including me in this, it's really annoying' I know it's dumb to take it personally. But then I get to thinking, am I the only one doing this because, unlike the majority of my classmates I am still single? Does one have anything to do with the other? So basically I'm one of the last of my classmates not married. Of the married girls, most of them already have babies. Yay.
I'm not bitter or jealous. I know those are things you say when you really are feeling those emotions. But I am genuinely happy for every single one of my classmates. It is just hard to feel like I have too much free time, what with no husband or baby. Another girl thanked me for taking the time to let them know what is going on. Maybe I'm just projecting. But if they don't care, then why should I?
I could write a lame poem. I can laugh and brush it off. I can excuse myself, defend myself, pretend that it doesn't bother me. But sometimes straight-forward honesty works best.
I was never going to be one of those girls. I don't discuss dating, I don't bemoan my 'single fate'. I write because I genuinely enjoy writing. Is it stupid that I'm bothered because my class doesn't care about the alumni newsletter? Or does the fact that they don't care bother me because I'm thinking too much into it?
I get it. You've moved on. I just wish that I could feel like I've moved on too.
I think you are right to be upset that your class isn't interested. I think most of my class is participating. And, FTR, our class rep has two kids, and was one of the first to get married.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure what to make of it - but what I can say is that the fact that your class finds this annoying, hurts my feelings, too. And I don't even remember exactly which year you graduated.
P.S. - Time is what you make of it. Some people have lots of time, even with five kids. Some people have no time, even when they're single. Don't feel bad - it just means that you know time management.
They weren't much interested even when they were in school. I graduated two years after you.
Delete:) Thanks for the reassurance.
I guess what they were in school, they were after it. It's sad, though.
ReplyDeleteBTW - why did you give the post its name?
It's the lyrics of a song. 'All Star' by Smash Mouth-
ReplyDelete"Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead"
(L for loser.)